Chinwag 01 Transcript
Martin O'Toole 00:05
Cool Well, before we just do this, it's probably worth just introducing the chinwag. So we're gonna have episodes, full episodes, right? which we've agreed to, we're an hour and a half each. Where we're going to talk to esteemed guests from around the world and in barley, but also we wanted to just have some chinwags here in there because I don't know, perhaps because we might find ourselves being more serious during some of the interviews given the nature of some of them with our guests, but also we want to we want our guests to have the opportunity to, to really talk a lot. So
Chris Siracuse 00:46
yeah, exactly. So for people that aren't British, can you explain what a chinwag is?
Martin O'Toole 00:50
That's a really good point. So a chinwag is when your chin
Chris Siracuse 00:57
don't do it.
Martin O'Toole 01:05
I can't explain it any better than this when your chin Wags a lot because you are speaking,
Chris Siracuse 01:11
okay? In this context, a chinwag refers to a casual conversation between the two hosts of How To Die Happy, perhaps doing a little retrospective on the episode that we recorded with a guest that week.
Martin O'Toole 01:25
significantly better description.
Chris Siracuse 01:27
Yeah, yeah. So you'll be able to notice this in your Spotify, Google podcast or Apple iTunes feed because it will have the prefix
Martin O'Toole 01:39
the monicker
Chris Siracuse 01:39
chin wag, I'm assuming I guess maybe I shouldn't promise that
Martin O'Toole 01:43
No, no, I think that's what we'll do — say "Chinwag one, Chinwag two..."
Chris Siracuse 01:47
in all caps, so you know,
Martin O'Toole 01:49
this, for example is chinwag one,
Chris Siracuse 01:52
this is chinwag one. Welcome to chinwag one,
Martin O'Toole 01:54
welcome to Chinwag One
Chris Siracuse 01:55
the pilot episode of The chinwag sub series and How To Die Happy because Martin just likes to talk that much. Yeah. couldn't just have one episode per week. Thanks for that.
Martin O'Toole 02:07
So this will take all manner of different formats. But today, I wanted to I wanted to hit you up with a surprise.
Chris Siracuse 02:16
Okay.
Martin O'Toole 02:17
So have you. Have you heard of the Illuminati?
Chris Siracuse 02:23
I have heard of the Illuminati. Yeah.
Martin O'Toole 02:25
Okay. So you know, because I post a lot of this sort of conscious thinking light work in love and light unity consciousness stuff on my Instagram?
Chris Siracuse 02:36
I do. Yeah, I do.
Martin O'Toole 02:37
Kind of constantly get hit up by kind of interesting characters. So, so recently, I got a message on my Instagram from somebody representing the Illuminati.
Chris Siracuse 02:52
Okay, all right. All right. I don't doubt you. But just for the sake of credibility, how do you know that they were legitimately representing the Illuminati?
Martin O'Toole 03:01
Well, I don't want to spoil the story. At the beginning it's safe to say I was suspicious.
Chris Siracuse 03:10
So that the natural next step would be to think that it's the Illuminati. Okay. I mean, I, I can follow it
Martin O'Toole 03:17
or block them.
Chris Siracuse 03:18
Well, no, I mean, clearly don't block them. Let's have some fun with exactly that. So that's what we're gonna do in today's chinwag.
Martin O'Toole 03:25
Well, essentially Yeah, so what happened was just to take you up to where we're going to go here,
Chris Siracuse 03:28
Take me
Martin O'Toole 03:30
Take me so I got I had this little chinwag by the miracle of Instagram messaging with this this chap purporting to be from the Illuminati
Chris Siracuse 03:42
and they actually say that
Martin O'Toole 03:44
oh yeah yeah for sure
Chris Siracuse 03:45
said he said that. Yeah, like
Martin O'Toole 03:46
Illuminati yada yada. And his profile, even like a little red triangle and the whole you know, be the light sort of vibe. Yeah, man. It's like, it's a big, big deal. And, but what he said I had to do was, I had to communicate with his grand master, and his grand master had selected me. So I had been selected to be recruited for the Illuminati. So I'm like, Okay, cool. Fascinating. How does this work? Well, here's a WhatsApp number you have to start communicating with my my Grandmaster via WhatsApp. I have to say it wasn't what I expected now, in terms of I had high high hopes that day when I was eventually approached by the by the you know, this elite secret society
Chris Siracuse 04:28
Well, that's what I find so funny, at least about this part of the story is that it's the Illuminati yet they're messaging you through Instagram and WhatsApp and that kind of contrast there.
Martin O'Toole 04:39
Well,
Chris Siracuse 04:39
I think they'd have their own platform. Yeah.
Martin O'Toole 04:45
I mean, yeah, well, you're gonna hear some of this so so what I've done so I what I've done is I've transcribed an entire WhatsApp conversation with the Illuminati Grandmaster and I thought We could read it out
Chris Siracuse 05:01
you transcribed this
Martin O'Toole 05:02
I've transcribed this
Chris Siracuse 05:04
you do not have enough to do
Martin O'Toole 05:08
Arguably yes. I
Chris Siracuse 05:10
noticed that you transcribed it into actual script format to a courier font as well yeah no it's beautiful.
Martin O'Toole 05:18
first draft
Chris Siracuse 05:18
yeah we're doing it we're doing a table read
Martin O'Toole 05:20
here Yeah, you know first draft of the software Yeah,
Chris Siracuse 05:22
so you mean final draft? Oh, sorry. Final Draft your screenwriter
Martin O'Toole 05:26
Yeah, yeah. first draft final draft. But well, I figured that would be more familiar to you right so
Chris Siracuse 05:31
thank you. Thank you
Martin O'Toole 05:32
so what I thought but I thought we'd do the right two parts in this there's me and there's the Illuminati Grandmaster
Chris Siracuse 05:38
okay,
Martin O'Toole 05:39
but I thought it'd be more fun if you were me. Okay, I will be the Illuminati Grandmaster
Chris Siracuse 05:44
Oh can I do the accent?
Martin O'Toole 05:46
No, you can't because as we've identified several times now your English accent is terrible
Chris Siracuse 05:51
I know, but this can be a chance for it to get
Martin O'Toole 05:53
better Okay, I mean, try and start rolling with start rolling. Okay, so just ask yourself after the first couple of sentences ask yourself how annoying it might be for the audience.
Chris Siracuse 06:04
Oh yeah. Fair enough,
Martin O'Toole 06:05
especially the English ones
Chris Siracuse 06:07
fair enough. So just to distil this and really in a concise way so what we what we're preparing to do here is read a little play that is based off of a transcription between an Illuminati Grandmaster and my good friend and and host here Martin O'Toole
Martin O'Toole 06:24
correct
Chris Siracuse 06:25
as he as he has been actively recruited by the Illuminati this what you're going to see performed here by the two of us is is what transpired
Martin O'Toole 06:34
It's a legit legit conversation via via WhatsApp
Chris Siracuse 06:38
Jesus Christ. All right, let's do this. And this is the first time I'm seeing this.
Martin O'Toole 06:41
Yeah,
Chris Siracuse 06:42
Martin just just sprung this thing off on it.
Martin O'Toole 06:44
I thought it would be more fun it we did it.
Chris Siracuse 06:45
I think it's hilarious. Let's do it. I'm reading
Martin O'Toole 06:47
Okay, so, I mean, you might want to read the title. Actually, don't read the title. Just go straight. Be me. So so I've been
Chris Siracuse 06:57
the title is the first the first sentence.
Martin O'Toole 07:02
So I've been teed up okay, this guy has given me a WhatsApp number.
Chris Siracuse 07:05
Okay.
Martin O'Toole 07:06
He said just call it just contact him. I'm like, Really? That's how it goes. Yeah, just just send him a WhatsApp. Okay. I'm gonna send him a WhatsApp. So, so you are now me.
Chris Siracuse 07:14
Okay I am you right? Hi. Hi, I'm Martin. Oh, no, that's not what he's saying. Okay. Okay. Word Up, Grandmaster. How's the light treating you this fine Friday? I was told you wish to speak with me. What the fuck?!
Martin O'Toole 07:39
as well. This is the Grand Master of the greater Illuminati family. And I got an information about you joining the greater Illuminati brotherhood.
Chris Siracuse 07:51
Cool. Well, not quite yet. I suppose I need to hear a little more about the process. Also, where are you based?
Martin O'Toole 07:59
I am from USA. And where are you from?
Chris Siracuse 08:03
beautiful country. We're about
Martin O'Toole 08:05
Okay, brother. I will tell you all about the Illuminati. Okay.
Chris Siracuse 08:14
We'll skip the small talk then, I suppose?
Martin O'Toole 08:18
The Illuminati Brotherhood is all about riches and famous and you can achieve anything in life once you are a full member of the Illuminati.
Chris Siracuse 08:28
Oh my god. I see. Thank you. I've always been fascinated with the Illuminati. Might you tell me more about how the Illuminati, the Knights of Malta, the Freemasons, the Rosa curious Ian's
Martin O'Toole 08:38
Rosicrucians
Chris Siracuse 08:39
Rosicrucians and the Elders of Zion all allegedly working together for the betterment of humanity?
Martin O'Toole 08:46
What is the Illuminati? The Illuminati is an elite organisation of world leaders, business authorities, innovators, artists and other influential members of this planet. Our coalition unites influences of all political, religious and geographical backgrounds to further the prosperity of the human species as a whole.
Chris Siracuse 09:08
Yeah, I know. I've read the Illuminati First Testament, but that's not I really wish I could do this. Okay, keep going. Keep going.
Martin O'Toole 09:19
Yes, I just want to make just wanted you to understand that. What you said they
Chris Siracuse 09:27
take that back to back
Martin O'Toole 09:28
Okay, so you go back, you go.
Chris Siracuse 09:31
So, so Martin, the grandmasters with him. It just went through this whole thing. And Martin responds by saying, Yes, I know, I've read the Illuminati first testament, but that's not what I asked.
Martin O'Toole 09:42
Grandmaster replies. Yes, I just wanted to make sure you understand that
Chris Siracuse 09:46
more than you know.
Martin O'Toole 09:48
Okay.
Chris Siracuse 09:49
So can you tell me more about these organisations I've mentioned, please. The doctrine of the Rosicrucians for example, appears to share familiar hermetic principles and practices to your society. Which obvious shared resonance around the symbology and links to Egypt and the Temple of Solomon? fascinating stuff.
Martin O'Toole 10:06
The Knights Templar full name the United religious, military and Masonic orders of the temple and of St. JOHN of Jerusalem, Palestine roads and Malta is a Fraternal Order affiliated with Freemasonry. Unlike the initiated degrees conferred in a regular Masonic Lodge, which in most regular Masonic jurisdictions only require a belief in a supreme being regardless of religious affiliation bracket one bracket, the Knights Templar is one of several additional Masonic orders in which membership is open only to Freemasons who profess a belief in Christianity.
Chris Siracuse 10:46
Did you just cut and paste that?
Martin O'Toole 10:53
No.
Chris Siracuse 10:55
Right okay then moving on. I have to turn it $6,666.66 to the order as an energetic symbol of my allegiance is this correct?
Martin O'Toole 11:09
No. This really happened? No, you are not to sacrifice that amount. Okay.
Chris Siracuse 11:28
Really? Oh, okay, well what's the next step then? I like the sound of this riches and famous business.
Martin O'Toole 11:34
So can we proceed with the first step on how you can become a member of the organisation?
Chris Siracuse 11:39
Yeah, I guess so. could do with knowing a little bit more about my role and responsibilities though? Is this a full time position? Like I'm from meeting at your local Indonesian office? Or perhaps we could zoom all the rage now.
Martin O'Toole 11:54
Okay, brother, don't worry about anything all you asked will be answered. Okay. The most important thing right now is for you to become a full member first. Okay?
Chris Siracuse 12:05
For sure. Yeah. Where's where's your office
Martin O'Toole 12:08
Grand Lodge in Washington DC?
Chris Siracuse 12:10
Oh, I'm in Bali?
Martin O'Toole 12:13
That's where the that's where the Illuminati templates located.
Chris Siracuse 12:16
might we meet a little closer to me? What would have been a global organisation and all Canggu? Perhaps some lovely vegan coffee shops there.
Martin O'Toole 12:26
Yes, for sure we can meet Okay, first, I just have to tell you everything you need to do to become a member of the organisation, okay. Once you are a full member, you will be invited to the temple.
Chris Siracuse 12:38
Can't we do it face to face far more efficient than WhatsApp?
Martin O'Toole 12:42
It's not a difficult process.
Chris Siracuse 12:44
I thought I had to come to the temple undergo a stringent initiation prior to being accepted. Tell you what I'm doing. vaycay How about I come to Washington early next week. Always wanted to see the White House.
Martin O'Toole 12:57
No, you need to become a member first. Okay. Be that
Chris Siracuse 13:06
How long did this go on?
Martin O'Toole 13:11
It's not that long. I mean, it went on for most of the day. And he called me several times. He keeps calling
Chris Siracuse 13:20
he called you?
Martin O'Toole 13:21
he keeps calling me
Chris Siracuse 13:22
did you answer?
Martin O'Toole 13:23
No! I'm not answering!
Chris Siracuse 13:24
Oh my god. Okay. Well, it's been This is good. This is brilliant. Brilliant. We're picking off where we so Martin has just asked, he can visit the main lodge in Washington DC because he's due a vaycay
Martin O'Toole 13:35
and I always want to see the white house
Chris Siracuse 13:36
and he wants your house.
Martin O'Toole 13:38
Anyway, back to the Grand Master. That's the other from the high priest you most become a member first before you will be invited to the temple. Okay. That's why I'm here to guide you through all the process. So shall we proceed with the first step?
Chris Siracuse 13:55
Okey dokey. Let's hear it.
Martin O'Toole 13:56
Okay, brother. Greetings from the elite Society of the Illuminati. I am Grandmaster Camren Poe by name and second in command of this great commission. You are welcome to the new world order. We appreciate your interest in deciding to become a member of the elite Society of the Illuminati and join our global community. Not one for punctuation this guy. I hope you're not here to spy on our anonymity and how we operate? You should be respectful to me and always address me as a FATHER and respond with respect so that I am satisfied with you and can work with you. So you want to move on and be guided in how to unite our global unity?
Chris Siracuse 14:41
Go Go Daddeo-Poe! I just realised I could have said Go Daddeo-Poe would have been an entirely more appropriate rhyme please proceed.
Martin O'Toole 14:54
I'm thinking might have typed that wrong. I think I said Go Go Daddeo the first
Chris Siracuse 14:57
to go daddeo Poe
Martin O'Toole 14:59
then
Chris Siracuse 14:59
go go. Daddeo it's fine well he didn't seem to be amused because his response was just alright brother with a period
Martin O'Toole 15:07
all right brother. Where are you from? And how old are you?
Chris Siracuse 15:11
Don't you already know that what with you lot being the all seeing eye etc you have access to all of my data after all,
Martin O'Toole 15:18
you have control over all that. Okay. So that's why I'm asking you now brother.
Chris Siracuse 15:24
I'm sorry I don't I don't understand. I thought this was a delicate selection process where potential members are vetted prior to outreach.
Martin O'Toole 15:31
Just because I'm recruiting you don't mean I have all your information you have to understand that okay? I have been in the organisation from the year 1998 and I have help a lot of people to be a great member of the Illuminati.
Chris Siracuse 15:48
Forgive me, but I'm beginning to question whether you were actually American. Me too. Me too. Just a little aside. I'm also questioning the veracity of this guys claims.
Martin O'Toole 16:03
I am from American, brother, okay
Chris Siracuse 16:08
you're not though are you
Martin O'Toole 16:10
do not dare to questions me must show respect and call me father.
Chris Siracuse 16:17
Bless your heart. You're not really a grandmaster the Illuminati or you?
Martin O'Toole 16:21
Don't know what you mean.
Chris Siracuse 16:24
You're not very good at this Grandmaster Flash, however, is not lost brother. I'm a writer and English is my native tongue perhaps can help you improve your pitch to make it more believable. I've got a very reasonable hourly rate. Also the alumina Illuminati first treatment Avatar and your WhatsApp profile testament. Also the Illuminati first testament Avatar and your WhatsApp profile is rather badly scanned and cropped. I can recommend a good designer if you like?
Martin O'Toole 16:52
You dare to mock us?!
Chris Siracuse 16:56
the game's up for me that I'm already in Illuminati. While I've been talking to you, we've been trying to position. Knock knock. Prepare to see the Light.
Martin O'Toole 17:09
What do you talk about brother? You think everything I am saying right now is a joke.
Chris Siracuse 17:14
You're the subject of counterintelligence sting operation. We're watching you and are the real Illuminati.
Martin O'Toole 17:20
No, it's not okay. WTF are you saying?
Chris Siracuse 17:25
Well, what we have here is failure to communicate. Is that from the Stanley Kubrick movie is from Full Metal Jacket
Martin O'Toole 17:36
Full Metal Jacket
Chris Siracuse 17:36
what we have here have here is a failure to communicate. OH MY GOD! You are apparently incapable of comprehending what is about to happen to you. You're masquerading as a member of our elite society is a fraudulent step too far is extreme action. Get ready.
Martin O'Toole 17:54
Calm down and let me lead you on this okay?
Chris Siracuse 17:58
Jesus Christ. I am the epitome of calm you're about to meet the full might of the all powerful secret society a secret societies. I am a higher echelon member of the Illuminati you my literate thieving friend have been found guilty of impersonating an honourable member watching you we see so much time and energy Lord
Martin O'Toole 18:31
I just thought I'd be really good fun to
Chris Siracuse 18:33
Oh my god it's hilarious
Martin O'Toole 18:35
like I kind of freaked him out when I told him I was in the Illuminati
Chris Siracuse 18:38
clearly no you're not this is brilliant. Do you really flip the script? really did literally flip the script on it well
Martin O'Toole 18:49
he was so confused he said I just don't understand why the change of mind. Who told you that I am not an Illuminati I can prove myself don't show people your plans. Just show them your results
Chris Siracuse 19:02
Oh very Tony Robbins
Martin O'Toole 19:04
Who?
Chris Siracuse 19:06
Never mind.
Martin O'Toole 19:07
You have the right to think everything you are thinking right now and I am going to I'm not going to force you to do anything okay peace and light be with you.
Chris Siracuse 19:15
Wow, did you use your peace and light line?
Martin O'Toole 19:17
Well, I say peace and love but he's alright peace of mind.
Chris Siracuse 19:20
Okay, all about sorry, I don't mean
Martin O'Toole 19:21
Illumination.
Chris Siracuse 19:22
I don't mean to break character. Okay, so this Martin, bearing in mind I have a detailed understanding of our recruitment process. How on earth can you sensibly argue that you are recruiting Grandmaster of my organisation?
Martin O'Toole 19:33
No need to be like that brother. Okay.
Chris Siracuse 19:37
Where's your secret membership card? We all have one. Just send me a copy.
Martin O'Toole 19:46
Who made you remember the Illuminati? What's the master name?
Chris Siracuse 19:50
I'm hardly going to tell you that. Am I? We're a secret society. Now then, we both know you're not not in the Illuminati. But that's Okay, would you like to join? It's good package benefits depending on the order they might even throw in a company car within unlimited miles fuel card. What do you think? Would you like to hear more about the initiation process? Be the light... Hello, are you ready to begin the initiation process? It doesn't take too long though they'll require you to be prepared to make a blood sacrifice of one of your younger family members in the absence of such one can we provided at at a nominal extra cost? What say you ready to become a member of the world's elite? Did I mention the air miles scheme with the Star Alliance? Man it's off the charts! Platinum card on speed you know? Be the light
Martin O'Toole 20:43
stop being a joke
Chris Siracuse 20:46
right you see and others you see in yourself my friend peace and love Wow dude wow Is that it?
Martin O'Toole 20:53
That's it
Chris Siracuse 20:54
oh my god
Martin O'Toole 20:56
yeah, I mean wow right and the guy so then the guy called me but
Chris Siracuse 21:02
that's bloody brilliant brilliant.
Martin O'Toole 21:06
Yeah. So he called me a number of times and I said what why Why are you calling me the game/s up! Come on. Pack your bags because we're coming for you. And then he left I didn't hear back from him and then yesterday he called me back. And I was like "Grandmaster Flash! Did you just pocket dial me?!"
Chris Siracuse 21:26
What he say
Martin O'Toole 21:26
no, I wish to speak to you okay.
Chris Siracuse 21:29
You should I answered the call. I want to see where he's based well right what his accent is?
Martin O'Toole 21:34
I don't it was the funny thing is I googled this because obviously as we know Google is the font of all legitimate knowledge
Chris Siracuse 21:41
Yeah, absolutely. I want to know anything never really
Martin O'Toole 21:44
needed to be questioned.
Chris Siracuse 21:45
Yeah, I just Google it and now I'm an expert. Yeah, for sure.
Martin O'Toole 21:47
And I found a number of people talking about this Illuminati scam on Instagram. As a YouTuber I don't remember his name but he did a he he had a bit of banter with the guy and he made a film of it is is amusing. Wasn't I mean he didn't take it as far as
Chris Siracuse 22:06
I mean you you really took it to another level that he was probably so impressed with your ability to flip the script he probably wanted to enlist you in the scam
Martin O'Toole 22:17
that would have been imagine that!
Chris Siracuse 22:19
he was probably like I gotta get this guy he's really He's good.
Martin O'Toole 22:23
Well it kind of worked out so so that's my new vibe so so that happens to anyone listening if you are contacted by someone representing the Illuminati and tell them you're an Illuminati thing that's the best way
Chris Siracuse 22:36
Yeah,
Martin O'Toole 22:36
now that said you know, the Illuminati do have a website or is there is a website illuminati.org and they have a TV commercial,
Chris Siracuse 22:44
a TV
Martin O'Toole 22:45
TV commercial commercial, to join Illuminati and they have a book and so I was interested in generally interested in this stuff and it's kind of weird that secret society has got a website and a TV commercial
Chris Siracuse 22:58
a little weird yeah
Martin O'Toole 22:59
and a book but when you read the book and it's you know it's it's very well written
Chris Siracuse 23:06
I would hope so
Martin O'Toole 23:07
yeah. So I I honestly have no idea what's going on there. This is a bit of a strange world out there in the event that the Illuminati are watching this or listening to this I just like to say out there's no legit you know, kind of like rule against impersonating a higher echelon member of the Illuminati in order to wind up a scam mark as scam merchant from Nigeria or wherever this chap was from
Chris Siracuse 23:33
well i mean i think that regardless you were kind of put into a corner there and yeah, I was thinking the same thing that if they are watching this and we violated some kind of code of ethics first I would say I don't fucking care
Martin O'Toole 23:50
No, you can't say that!
Chris Siracuse 23:51
oh my god we're gonna get assassinated
Martin O'Toole 23:53
gonna get whacked
Chris Siracuse 23:54
okay well good we're gonna get this out there then they probably don't take too kindly to people mocking them
Martin O'Toole 24:00
No exactly
Chris Siracuse 24:00
I mean we say they you know my dad used to always say we are they I mean that that when we say they what are we really talking about?
Martin O'Toole 24:08
This is about to get profound
Chris Siracuse 24:10
it's going to get profound maybe we should cut it
Martin O'Toole 24:12
What do you mean? As in the Illuminati we?
Chris Siracuse 24:13
No no, just when you say cuz I oftentimes like say, Oh, they you know, talking about whoever put government authority Corporation
Martin O'Toole 24:22
the man!
Chris Siracuse 24:22
the man. And my dad has to remind me that, you know, at some point here, we are there and at some point he was he was the "they". So you look at the Illuminati and it's kind of hard to put boundaries around it and say this is this is this definitive organisation because it's really more it's it's taken on a whole other thing. It's it's, it's a myth, right? It's is this mixture of legitimate legitimacy, but also like this mythical aspect to it to you know,
Martin O'Toole 24:53
well, I think the whole thing is steeped in mystery and myth. It does have history. I think from back from the was it the 1800s? think it was an Austrian society at some point but but i don't know i have an open mind to these things I think. I think the best way to create misinformation is to put information out there
Chris Siracuse 25:13
exactly. That's
Martin O'Toole 25:14
conflicting information.
Chris Siracuse 25:15
That's what I think this is kind of controlled opposition if you had to use a CIA kind of espionage term or phrase entry now you're familiar with the the idea of controlled ops right?
Martin O'Toole 25:26
Talk to me.
Chris Siracuse 25:27
So I controlled opposition is when you intentionally make yourself part of whatever group that is that is opposing you, in order to steer that movement in a certain direction.
Martin O'Toole 25:40
So join their ranks,
Chris Siracuse 25:41
you essentially join their ranks. Yeah, so if we were to talk about controlled opposition in the case of the former Soviet Union in America, right, you would say or a better analogy would be the communist parties in America during the 1960s. The FBI at that point, I would assume, had some kind of controlled opposition meaning they had people that were not ranks they were in the ranks, but they weren't that the point was not to infiltrate the ranks in order to get information from the people in the organisation. The point was actually to control the movement and steer the movement in a different direction. You're gonna
Martin O'Toole 26:17
Very Machaivellian!
Chris Siracuse 26:17
Very Machiavellian absolutely anyway, so I imagine there's a certain element of that I also imagine it's just a certain amount of what you what we just laid out here which is people that have no connection to this they're just manipulating it and using it for humour in our case because it's funny or
Martin O'Toole 26:37
what else are you gonna do but laugh at that
Chris Siracuse 26:39
hilarious
Martin O'Toole 26:40
thing about that for me was I I almost go into the whole dialogue with him about Do people seriously for for this and actually what then happens? excuse me watching the YouTuber he explained because the YouTuber actually allowed him to carry on instead of flipping the script and being an Illuminati member what the guy does is essentially it's all about the first step the first step the first step you notice how he kept saying let's get you the first step and what they do is they say well you know with in this day and age when nobody can travel we can fast track you you get so you actually they do actually send out a laminated card so you have to say give me a private personal details great idea. She had to give more your personal details they there and a photo so this guy uploaded a photograph but he like messed with it you look like Shrek by the time he was done and they still just accepted him with a card man alive the card looks like something that you know like make in primary school you know like the logo was stuck on the piece the card wasn't framed properly. I mean it was bad it was bad bad bad cut and paste and what they were trying to do is essentially so they wanted $1,000 if I recall off him to to to get him to give him his card so you get to skip the whole initiation process. I'm lucky guy in this day and age. He said the guy said honestly I got $1,000 to join the Illuminati it's a lot of money. So any sort of but it Meanwhile he said while we're at it I've pinged your IP address and you're in Nigeria he told me you're in the states where this guy was by the way so this guy's did he actually ping his IP he did he did so he said here's the proof here's your IP yada yada looks to me a lot like you're in Africa No, no, no,
Chris Siracuse 28:42
didn't even use a VPN Wow.
Martin O'Toole 28:45
Who knew? So this guy is quite clearly a scammer in Nigeria playing this game and meanwhile back at the ranch this YouTuber was getting a little bit fed up so he's he's called him out the cage is totally ignored him. So the YouTuber said well I honestly I've had enough now it's been been fun but I gotta get on with my life now so you know, let's just call it a day. The guy kept calling him back. So anyway, so right What can I do for you? Honestly, I thought this was over. Don't worry, I'm so keen for you to join the Illuminati that I've paid your $1,000
Chris Siracuse 29:19
so what does he get out of? The $1,000
Martin O'Toole 29:23
Wow, it's really kind of you. You just send me my membership card then. Yes, we're going to send it for you now in a car, but it will cost $350. He's like Hang on a minute! Look, I'm in the States. You're in estates. Do I trust the postal service? You send it in the post? No, no, we can't send the illustrious, esteemed membership card in the post. The Postal Service is not good enough for this. We must send it in a special Illuminati car. Of course. Of course. Yeah. Anyway, went on and on and the guides basically called. So I just figured I'd share that with you because it was highly amusing. Jules said to me at the time, are you still talking to that Illuminati guy?
Chris Siracuse 30:04
Yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna have to go with Jules on this one. That was my first thought. The producer in me is like how much time
Martin O'Toole 30:12
it was worth
Chris Siracuse 30:12
and you're still getting lots of work done. I will say that. It's very impressive Martin.
Martin O'Toole 30:18
I just figured it would have a place. I just didn't really have a place in this podcast.
Chris Siracuse 30:22
The first chinwag.
Martin O'Toole 30:24
First chinwag.
Chris Siracuse 30:26
And I think the real takeaway here what is the real takeaway? Well, here's a question. Do you think given this as the How To Die Happy podcast I think these people are happy?
Martin O'Toole 30:41
Who the Illuminati or the Nigerian scam?
Chris Siracuse 30:43
I was actually thinking both I was first thing in the Illuminati. You know,
Martin O'Toole 30:46
we could get lost in a conversation about how happy people are based on the fact that they own a lot of stuff.
Chris Siracuse 30:52
Yeah,
Martin O'Toole 30:53
whether or not that defines happiness. I suspect we'll probably cover that in, in a few more episodes. I don't know I can't speak for anybody else. I, I always say, I respect everybody's truth. So regardless of whether or not you are in a random secret society that may or may not do some slightly spurious stuff, not for me to comment, you know, as long as you're happy.
Chris Siracuse 31:14
Yeah, you know, I really appreciate your acceptance. As you know, by now I am not as accepting. Not even close. I'm learning from brother Martin. But yeah, not there yet. Cuz I tend to think like, fuck. What the fuck is wrong with you? Because here's my thought. If you if you have
Martin O'Toole 31:36
Here we go!
Chris Siracuse 31:37
yeah, here we go. I'm so glad that I'm not doing greener us anymore. Because I can actually talk where I want to talk. So if you if you feel the need to impose your will on others, I would say that you are probably not very happy. And that's what I see a lot. I mean, what little I know about the Illuminati and people of that ilk? If they do exist, even if they don't, you just take the idea. And you apply that to people that we know exist.
Martin O'Toole 32:02
Well
Chris Siracuse 32:02
I can't imagine you're very happy if you feel the need to control impose your will in that way.
Martin O'Toole 32:07
Well, that's a good perspective. But then on the flip side of that, so the whole idea behind the, let's put the Illuminati away for a minute talk about luciferians. Now, Illuminati—luciferians—there have been many people draw comparisons and say they're one in the same. I am not saying that because I don't know. But people who worship Lucifer, see Lucifer as the Lord of Light. So they see what so what one person or group of people see as light (illumination), others shall we say, Christians for example, see that as darkness so one man's light is another man's darkness
Chris Siracuse 32:50
that's really interesting because you can I could see how that would work. If you believe that the betterment of the human species is to be controlled by a elite in quotes is
Martin O'Toole 33:02
out of control,
Chris Siracuse 33:03
right
Martin O'Toole 33:03
bla bla bla and
Chris Siracuse 33:05
so some some deep philosophical ground here.
Martin O'Toole 33:08
So just for the absence of doubt, I am not an ambassador of any secret society whatsoever
Chris Siracuse 33:15
Neither um, I just want to make that clear.
Martin O'Toole 33:19
All pending applications have just been cancelled
Chris Siracuse 33:25
I will never I'm not a I'm not an adherent to anything
Martin O'Toole 33:30
No, no, exactly. That's the best way to be Yeah, be open and closed to everything Yeah, well
Chris Siracuse 33:35
be open and close to everything I like that since I think that's describes my my current state
Martin O'Toole 33:41
It's a safe position
Chris Siracuse 33:43
It's a safe position.
Martin O'Toole 33:44
But um, I don't know, I don't know what, what these guys are doing and what they're up to, if they exist. There are so many theories around these things aren't there so but if there are people who genuinely believe that the world is misguided and fallen apart and yada yada and it needs controlling by a one world, government and so on and so forth, who am I to dissuade them of that the one thing I will say about this and this is just a matter of fact is, if these organisations are comprised of elites, the highest of the high of the the most wealthy and the most aristocratic and whatever whoever these people are of society of global society, then the same people are in turn responsible, albeit vicariously for the management of the love of the destruction of the same the very same planet now that I am at odds with
Chris Siracuse 34:47
Well, that is true, that was very interesting. Yeah. Because if you take that as kind of the the metric, they're not doing so well then arent the?
Martin O'Toole 34:57
right?
Chris Siracuse 34:58
Yeah. So Little shout out to the Illuminati if you're out there if what Martin
Martin O'Toole 35:05
don't whack us, let's get you also
Chris Siracuse 35:06
don't whack us but
Martin O'Toole 35:10
because this is this podcast is is supposed to be for the betterment of society
Chris Siracuse 35:14
yeah and all we're asking is he just take a close look at your KPIs your key performance indicators for people that don't know and if you were running this like you'd run an organisation I would say that you are not hitting your KPIs.
Martin O'Toole 35:28
Or contrastly we would welcome a spokesperson from the Illuminati in the How To Die Happy podcast
Chris Siracuse 35:37
the actual Illuminati Yeah,
Martin O'Toole 35:38
I got pretty good at sniffing.
Chris Siracuse 35:42
But hey, if you are a scammer and you want to you know try to pitch us
Martin O'Toole 35:46
Yep,
Chris Siracuse 35:46
membership from another secret society.
Martin O'Toole 35:49
Try it. Or if you're a scammer who has realised through this live example that your scam is is quite frankly lacking in a number of areas, then get in touch and we'll see if we can help you out with English language, grammar, and punctuation for sure. And better graphic design work.
Chris Siracuse 36:08
This is a whole other revenue stream that I wasn't even thinking
Martin O'Toole 36:11
might be the only revenue stream!
Chris Siracuse 36:13
So how about if anyone that's listening right now please share, like, subscribe and follow so we do not have to resort to consulting for one of these scammers, right?
Martin O'Toole 36:23
Great idea. And
Chris Siracuse 36:24
We really appreciate that.
Martin O'Toole 36:26
Thank you for listening.
Chris Siracuse 36:27
Thank you so much for listening. This has been chinwag 01 I don't know
